its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Randomize
