I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
