That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
