considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
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