evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
