So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
