You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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