wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
