Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize