Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
