i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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