At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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