I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize