Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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