I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
He passed out mid-signature
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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