what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I pour the whiskey from now on
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
