just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Randomize
