No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
