Dual....:-)
I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
He better not be in your backpack
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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