how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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