taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize