real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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