I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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