And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
His nipple licking is glorious
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