Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Randomize