I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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