My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
that may or may not have been my penis.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
