ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
