I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize