he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
