VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
