Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
