I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
