I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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