K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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