Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
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