Who did Billy Mays play for?
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
