Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
