Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize