that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
