Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
