And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
