just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
