He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
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