You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
