His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize