He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
they call him Oral-B. enough said
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize