"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
