i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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