Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
