she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
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