But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
