i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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